(San Francisco, USA) by Nancy Newman
Time is precious. We worry about it, plan for it, and never have enough of it. Women lawyers, in particular, are deeply concerned about time, as they struggle to balance the heavy demands of law practice, client needs, and the many obligations – both joyous and stressful – of raising a family. Bar newsletters are filled with articles, blogs, and programs about our essential struggles with time. But did you know, you can make time?
While time on a watch is uniform, time for a human is relative. The longest year in my life was between my fifth and sixth birthdays. After my fifth birthday, I began thinking about time and measuring the time until my next birthday. I checked in with my parents regularly on this issue: how much longer until my birthday? After a few check-ins, the response was something like, “11 months, 6 days, and 7 hours.” I knew I was in for a very long year.
Now my time is racing by. Years flow one to the next. I have had plenty of birthdays, and earned a few gray hairs to go with them. I have a busy practice, wonderful clients, and lots to do. My daughters are 19 and 23, and for all the stress I had when they were younger about work-life balance, they turned out just fine. In fact, given the essential adaptability of most children, I think the work-life balance debate is much more about maternal guilt and societal expectations than it is about children. There are many different ways to raise children successfully. Love is the most important ingredient, and love is what infuses whatever time you spend with meaning. The meaning you derive from the time you spend directly affects your perception of it.
So here’s a thought. Instead of worrying about your shortage of time, decide to work on something outside of yourself, and outside of your normal work-family routine. Decide to work for women’s rights. Decide to donate your skills, your time, your intelligence to the greater struggle for gender equity and justice, around the world. Reflect upon the challenges so many women face every single day, just to survive. Appreciate the risk that so many are taking to protect and advocate for women in the direst of circumstances. Consider these issues, and you will perceive the challenges in your own life differently.
When you give your time to this cause, your feelings about time will change. You will want to do more of this work. You will find time you did not know you had. So sign up, and get involved. Pretty soon, you’ll be making time.
Nancy J. Newman is the founder and president of the International Action Network for Gender Equity & Law (IANGEL).